FORTY

Some of you may have noticed I changed the title. I picked 'Falling' when I first decided to write this, but it doesn't really fit with the story anymore. The new title, Such Great Heights, is inspiried by this song by the same name by an excellent band called the Postal Service. Sorry if this caused any confusion. Let me know what you think of the title change, and if you have ideas for a better one leave a comment!

***

The bright winter sun blasted through the drapeless windows and stung my eyes unpleasantly as I woke up the next morning. Although I was still wrapped up in Sidney, I was completely frozen. I pulled on my clothes and coat and kissed his forehead lightly. "Wake up, mon cher," I whispered.

He didn't open his eyes, but a wide smile spread across his face. "This is the best morning I've had in a long time," he muttered.

I laughed. "Sidney, we spent the night on the floor without blankets or pillows."

He sat up and wrapped his arms around me. "It doesn't matter," he whispered into my hair. "You're here."

I smiled and tangled my hands in his hair as he kissed the curve where my neck and shoulder meet. "You're such a charmer."

"Mmhmm," he muttered, his lips never leaving my neck. "I charmed the pants right off you." We both started laughing, killing the moment, but neither of us minded. Sid redressed and then stretched his arms over his head. "We're going to need some heavy drapes for those windows," he said, squinting from the bright sun.

I didn't reply; I just smiled. I liked hearing him talk about drapes, as stupid as it sounded. I was excited to buy things for the house together—our house.

"My car is still at Marc's," I said as we walked downstairs.

"Oh, yeah, I'll take you back there." He paused for a second, looking thoughtful. "Do you think Sylvie will make us breakfast?"

I laughed and followed him out of the house and followed him to the Range Rover. "I don't want to see Sylvie. I'm terrified for her to start firing questions at me. I'm surprised she didn't call when she realized my car was in the driveway but I wasn't in the house."

"What are you going to tell her?" he asked as he pulled out of the driveway.

"The truth," I replied with a shrug.

"The whole truth?"

"We tell each other pretty much everything."

"Yikes," Sid muttered. I smirked, wondering if he was trying to guess how much Sylvie knew about him. He looked at me, a wide smile spreading across his face. "So what dirt do you have on Flower?"

"Oh no." I shook my head and crossed my arms across my chest. "We have girl-to-girl confidentiality. I'm not telling you stuff about Marc just so you can tease the poor guy."

"Karine," he said, feigning a shocked expression, "I would not make fun of him!"

I rolled my eyes. "Right."

The drive to Marc and Sylvie's house took less than ten minutes. Sid pulled into their driveway and got out of the Range Rover to tell me goodbye. "I'll call you after practice," he promised, planting a kiss on my lips.

"Okay," I replied, returning the kiss. "We can go furniture shopping!" Sid unintentionally grimaced and I laughed. "Fine, I'll ask Sylvie if she wants to come."

"Alright. I'll see you later." Sid kissed me again, lingering this time. I placed my hands on the back of his neck, hungry for me. "Okay. I really need to go," he said reluctantly as he pulled away. He kissed me one last time before jumping into his Range Rover and driving away.
I patted my pockets, looking for my car keys, and then realized they were in my jeans—the jeans that Lauren had puked on and I had changed out of. I groaned and looked at the front door. Either I had to face Sylvie or walk home. I reluctantly walked to the front door, rang the doorbell, and prayed Marc and Sylvie were awake.

Sylvie opened the door almost instantly—she had probably been standing at the window, watching Sid and I since the moment she heard him pull in.

"What. The. Hell." She tried to maintain a serious expression, but failed. "Where did you two go last night?"

"To his house."

"Why did you go all the way to Mario's? Your place is closer."

I shook my head. "No, we went to his house."

"He bought a house?"

"Yep. By the way, we're going furniture shopping today. Now, where are my pants? I need my keys." I was trying to get out of the house as quickly as possible, because I wasn't feeling up to rehashing the events of last night in extreme detail to my best friend.

"Is that Karine?" Marc called from the kitchen.

"Yeah!" Sylvie called back. "Sidney bought a house!"

"What?!" Marc came limping into the foyer. If he wouldn't have been in a walking cast from his ankle sprain, he probably would have ran. "Sid bought a house?"

"Girl, you have some explaining to do," Sylvie said.

I laughed and rolled my eyes. "Get me some coffee."

Sylvie and I moved into the kitchen and I gave her a play-by-play of last night's events.
"It was the outfit, wasn't it?" Sylvie said once I had finished. "He saw you in those jeans and that top and couldn't keep his hands off of you."

I rolled my eyes. "Your slutty clothes had nothing to do with this," I joked. "Although, I might have to get a pair of Seven jeans. My butt looks amazing."

Sylvie chuckled and shook her head. "So, let me get this straight. Last Friday, Sid moves out of your place because he can't stand to be around you. Then you run off to Montreal, and the night you come back you two get back together. And now you have a house together?"

I laughed. It sounded ridiculous when she said it, but that was basically my week in a nutshell. "Yeah, that's about right."

"How does that even happen?!" Sylvie asked, sounding exasperated and stunned. "You're either both insane or totally meant for each other. Nothing else could explain how you two are even speaking to each other, let alone moving in together."

"I like to think we're meant for each other," I said, taking a sip of coffee.

Sylvie smirked. "So you're staying in Pittsburgh for him."

"I'm going to try. If I can find a new job, I won't go to Paris. But if I can't…"

"You will," Sylvie replied confidently. "You two are meant to be together. The universe is on your side."

***

Around noon, Sylvie and I visited a local furniture store. "What exactly do you need?" she asked as we looked at the selection of beds.

"Well, I have a bedroom suit that we can use in one of the guest rooms, but that's about it…my kitchen table is way too small for the dining room and Sid hates my living room furniture."

"I love spending money," Sylvie said with a contented sigh.

I laughed. "We're not buying anything today. I'm just going to take a picture of everything I like, and then show it to Sid later so he can make a decision."

"Woah, look at you being a good girlfriend."

"I try," I replied with a smile. "So, how's Marc coming along?" I asked as we looked at a classic, king sized sleigh bed.

Sylvie looked slightly pained as she sighed and ran her hand along the edge of the bed. "I don't know. He's going to be out for a while yet…we're more worried about what's going to happen after he's healthy."

"What do you mean?"

"He isn't Sidney, Karine," Sylvie replied with a bitter smile. "Marc isn't a superstar. The team has two decent backup goalies in Sabourin and Conklin…they can survive without him."
"Sylvie, don't say that! They won't trade Marc."

"But they can send him to Wilkes-Barre," she said quietly.

I tried to think of things I could say to reassure my friend, but my mind was blank. Although I hadn't been playing close attention to the Penguins lately, they were playing well and winning games. They hadn't had Marc in the goal since early December, but that didn't seem to have much of an effect on their record. Chances were very good that Marc would be sent down to play for the Penguin's AHL team, and, worst case scenario, he wouldn't be called back up.

"That won't happen." I tried to sound confident, but there was a hint of doubt in my voice. I really hoped Marc wouldn't be sent to Wilkes-Barre, but who knew what could happen?

Sylvie looked somewhat uncomfortable as we moved to the next bed. "I'm just torn, you know?" She paused, but I didn't say anything. I knew she just needed me to listen. "I want the team to do well, and for that to happen they need a good goalie. But at the same time, I want Conklin and Sabourin to suck so Marc can be guaranteed his job."

"I wish I knew what to say, Syl," I replied sympathetically.

She shook her head. "I hope I'm worrying about nothing. It's just…there have been some rumors. Some of the guys have mentioned that Shero wants to trade some people for a couple wingers. And with Marc injured…we're worried he might be one of those people."

"No way," I replied firmly. "Marc means a lot to the team. They're not going to trade him."
Sylvie arched her eyebrows. I knew she thought I was only saying what she wanted to hear, but I really believed that Marc would be a Pittsburgh Penguin for a long time. He had amazing chemistry with the other guys, and even though he might not be a 'superstar' he was still a great goalie.

"Hey, check out this chair!" Sylvie said with a laugh. She plopped down in a chair that was shaped like a hand and spread out on it seductively. "I bet Sidney would love this!"

"Oh, yeah," I replied sarcastically. "That isn't tacky at all." I was glad Sylvie changed the subject; she obviously didn't want to talk about Marc's status with the team anymore, and I was glad about that. I didn't know how to assure my friend that her boyfriend would still be wearing black and gold by this time next month. Even worse, I wasn't sure if my assurances would turn out to be empty promises.

THIRTY-NINE

Instead of driving into the city, Sidney turned the opposite direction and drove north. I glanced at the clock. It was almost two o'clock. Where could we possibly be going this late?

The highway was practically abandoned, so it was only a short time before Sid turned into the righthand lane and took an exit. I read the slightly familiar name on the sign and looked at Sidney. "Fox Chapel? What's in Fox Chapel?"

"You'll see," he replied.

I sighed and crossed my arms over my chest. I hated surprises, especially when they involved some suburb I have never been to.

"Just relax, okay?" Sid said with a laugh. "We're almost there."

We were in a quiet, residential neighborhood now. We turned down a street and I noticed the houses got progressively larger the further we drove. "Are we going to visit someone?" I asked.

Sid only smiled in reply, never taking his eyes off the road. He eventually turned into a bricked driveway and parked outside of an impressive three car garage. We got out of the Range Rover and I studied the outline of the house. Although it was dark out, the moon reflecting off the blanket of white snow that covered the yard offered enough light for me to discern that we were standing in front of a large, two story brick home. Despite its size, it had a cozy charm to it.

Sid held out his hand to me and I intertwined my fingers with his. I loved that it felt so natural, like our hands were molded for each other. Suddenly, all the reservations I had about our relationship disappeared. I knew we were meant for each other. I knew that if I left him, I would never find a man who fit so well with me.

"Who lives here?" I asked as we approached the front door.

"We do," Sid replied as he turned the key in the lock.

"What?"

"I told you I was looking for a house. I bought this one a couple days ago."

"You bought a house," I repeated as Sid led me into the foyer.

"It was a little impulsive," he said with a shrug. "But I fell in love with this place as soon as I saw it. I knew you would like it, too." It stung that he thought of me when he was purchasing this home. A couple days ago…a couple days ago we weren't speaking. "I'll give you a tour."

He flicked the light on and lit up a high-ceilinged, airy foyer. Directly in front of us a staircase led to the second floor. There was a large chandelier hanging above our heads, and it sparkled like a thousand tiny diamonds. Sid led me into a formal dining room, and then through a doorway and into a modern, newly remodeled kitchen.

"We probably won't use this very often," he chuckled. I noticed his use of the word "we," but chose not to say anything about it. Sid led me back through the dining room and foyer and into the comfortable, large living room. A classy fireplace was positioned against the right wall, and tall windows on the back wall looked out to the yard. "This," Sid said as he walked across the living room and through a doorway, "is the best part of the entire place."

I followed him and caught my breath when I found myself in a long sunroom that ran the length of the house. The three walls and ceiling were made completely of glass, offering an incredible view of the night sky and backyard.

"Isn't it amazing?" he asked, striving for my approval.

"This is great," I replied, stepping toward the glass wall that looked out into the backyard. "Is that a pool?"

"Yeah, it's massive. The guys are going to love it. You can't tell because of the snow, but there's a patio that leads out of here and it runs the entire way around the pool. It's going to be great for barbeques."

"Wow, Sid. This place is beautiful. It's huge, but it somehow isn't pretentious. You know what I mean?"

Sid nodded and smiled. "That's why I love it. There's tons of room, but it fits my style. Let's go upstairs." We returned to the foyer and I followed Sid up the stairs. He showed me two bedrooms, each with their own small half bath, and then finally opened the door to the master suite. "This is our room," he said. I once again noted the use of the plural, but I was too stunned by the size of the room to comment. The bedroom itself was almost as big as my kitchen and living room. It even had its own fireplace.

"Wow," I breathed. "This room is huge!"

"Check out the bathroom," Sid replied, opening a door to my right. I stepped inside the bathroom and thought I had been transported to a spa. There was a Jacuzzi in the corner, a shower against the back wall, and a long counter with two sinks and tons of cabinet space.

I couldn't wipe away the huge smile that had appeared on my face. "This is…wow. Just wow."

Sid smiled at me proudly. "Did I do a good job?"

"You're going to love living here," I replied.

"So are you. Tell your landlord tomorrow that you're moving out."

"What?"

"I want you to move in with me." Sid stood behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist and rested his chin on my shoulder. "This is going to sound crazy, but when I bought this house all I could think about was how it would look if you lived here, too. Everything about this house just reminded me of you…even when I was so mad at you, I knew every day when I came home I would think of you. And I wanted that. I couldn't let you go."

I sighed and leaned into him. He probably didn't know it, but pangs of guilt were attacking my stomach. I knew I meant a lot to him, but tonight it was really hitting me. All I had been thinking about lately was myself—how I felt because Sid was mad at me. How the promotion would affect my life. Now, I realized that my life was no longer just about me—Sidney was just as much affected by every decision I made as I was. He was my other half. When did that happen?

"Are you excited to buy furniture and everything?" Sid asked, interrupting my thoughts.

I hesitated. "Are you sure? Don't you want to decorate? I mean, it is your house."

"No, it's our house," he replied. "Besides, I'm hopeless. I'd have to hire a decorator." He paused and looked at me seriously. "You don't mind living in the suburbs?"

"Not in a house like this," I replied with a laugh. "I wish there was a bed here…I want to spend the night."

"We don't need a bed," Sid replied with a mischievous grin. In one swift movement, he lifted me by the waist and slung me over his shoulder.

"Sidney!" I complained as he carried me out of the bathroom.

He gently lowered me to the floor and lay down beside me. "I've missed you," he whispered, kissing me sweetly.

"I'm sorry," I said. And I was sorry—I was sorry I pushed Sidney away, I was sorry I ran to Montreal, I was sorry I had wasted so much valuable time that could have been spent with him.

"Shh." Sid's mouth moved along my jaw line, down my neck, and to my chest. "It doesn't matter anymore."

THIRTY-EIGHT

"UGH! What the fuck, Lauren?" I shouted as I looked at Lauren's stomach contents that were now displayed all over my front. She'd covered a good portion of Sid, too.

"Sorry," Lauren replied thickly as she slumped to the floor.

Colby came running in the kitchen, probably to find out why I was screaming at his fiancé, and couldn't help but laugh when he saw Sid and I covered in vomit with disgusted expressions on our faces. "That sucks," he said between laughs.

"Fuck you, Army," Sidney replied, wrinkling his nose at the sight of his vomit-covered tee shirt.

"Oh, no!" Sylvie exclaimed as she entered the kitchen behind Colby. "Oh, guys, I am so sorry. Go upstairs and shower—Karine, you can use the bathroom in our bedroom, and Sid there's another bathroom down the hall. I'll find you two some clothes."

I stepped over Lauren, who was now passed out cold on the floor, and started up the stairs. Sid followed me silently and found his way to the upstairs bathroom as I entered Marc and Sylvie's master suite. I closed the bathroom door behind me and peeled off my smelly, stained clothes. I looked at my reflection in the mirror. At least she didn't get my hair, I thought. Yeah, some consolation.

I took a very quick shower and wrapped myself in a towel before opening the door. There were two pairs of clothes resting on the bed, the smaller set obviously meant for me. I heard the bedroom door open behind me and I turned to see Sidney, also in only a towel, enter the room.

"Oh, sorry," he said, blushing slightly. I noticed his eyes quickly wander over my body before he stared at the floor.

"It's fine," I replied. "Here, I think these are yours." I handed him the larger tee shirt and sweatpants.

"Thanks." He took the clothes and started at me for a few seconds, making me very uncomfortable. "Do you mind if I just change in here? I feel kind of…exposed, walking down the hall in only a towel."

"Sure. Whatever." I turned around and began to loosen my towel, but I could still feel Sidney's eyes on me. "Turn around, Crosby," I ordered.

"Nothing I haven't seen before," he replied.

I cocked one eyebrow and turned my head to look at him. "Turn around," I repeated.

Sid smiled, but obeyed. I held out the tank top Sylvie had left for me and shook my head. It was a deep red silk cami—very revealing, something I normally wouldn't wear. Sylvie and I were the same size, but she dressed much more provocatively than me. I sighed and pulled the cami over my head and decided to ask Sylvie for a sweatshirt later. I looked at the tag of the jeans she laid out for me and was surprised to see a 'Seven for all Mankind' label. She must really feel badly about Lauren puking on me, I thought.

"Can I turn around yet?" Sid asked as I pulled on the jeans.

"Yeah," I replied as I buttoned them. I ran my fingers through my wet hair and turned to face Sidney.

"Woah," he stammered, his eyes appreciatively moving over my body. "You should let Sylvie dress you more often."

"Stop," I replied tersely, crossing my arms across my chest. I felt very uncomfortable and exposed, and the hungry way Sid was looking at me didn't help matters.

"Sorry," Sid replied as he rubbed the back of his neck. We stood parallel to each other, and every so often Sidney's eyes would flicker to my scantily clad frame.

"So," I said awkwardly, finally breaking the silence, "when you said you didn't want to be friends..."

He shook his head. "I said I can't be your friend. I'm always going to want something more."

"Oh." I bit my bottom lip nervously and pressed on. "So...you want me to stay away." It wasn't a question. I knew if Sid couldn't be around me, I wouldn't make things harder for him.

"You really don't get it, do you?" he asked with a sardonic laugh. "I can't live without you, and I can't handle being 'just friends.' I want you back, Karine."

"I...I don't know if that's a good idea."

"Probably not. It would be easier for us to go our seperate ways. But nothing worth having ever comes easy." He paused and crossed his arms over his chest. I couldn't think clearly; he wanted me back? Was he insane? He was actually willing to forgive me after everything I'd done. Why the hell would he do that? "So...uh…have you made a decision about Paris?" he asked hesitantly. I knew from his tone that he was afraid of my answer.

I sighed and chewed on my bottom lip. It wouldn't surprise me if I tasted blood soon. "There was never any decision to make," I said quietly. "I'm going. I don't have a choice."

"Oh," he replied. His one word answer stung more than any full sentence he could have said. His voice was dripping with disappointment, and I could see the frustration in his face.

"I'm really sorry, Sid."

"Don't be. I get it. You had to decide between me and your career, and you chose your career. It was the smart thing to do."

I met his gaze and was unsurprised by his cold expression. "I don't like this either, you know."

"So don't go!" he practically shouted.

"Sidney, put yourself in my position. PPG is paying for my apartment, I'll be making over $100,000 a year, plus there's an entire list of other perks. Not to mention that this promotion is amazing for my career. It would be stupid for me to quit now. Can't you understand that?" I tried to remain calm, but my voice cracked with emotion. Don't cry, I ordered myself.

He shook his head. "This is what I understand. I understand that I love you. I understand that you're the most important thing in my life. And I understand that you're leaving me, which I guess means I am nowhere near as important to you as you are to me. That's what I understand."

I clenched my fists and tried very hard not to lose my temper. Now it was my turn to be frustrated. "Fuck you, Sid." My voice was quiet, but forceful. "Do you think this is easy for me? Why do you think I went to Montreal? I can't be around you anymore! It kills me to see how I've hurt you. You think you aren't my world? How dare you. How dare you! Do you honestly think I want to go to Paris? I have to, Sidney. You are the best thing that's ever happened to me, but are you going to be around in a year? What is going to happen to me if we break up and I never went? If I don't go to France, I'm going to regret it for the rest of my life. Is that what you want? Will that make you happy?" Sid didn't reply; he flushed slightly, and then stared at his feet. I knew I was getting to him, and I knew I should probably stop berating him, but I was on a roll. "You were drafted, what, almost three years ago? Tell me, Sidney, if we would have met in Rimouski three years ago and we had been this serious, what would have happened when you left Canada for Pittsburgh? What would you have done if I would have told you not to leave? What would do you if I was acting as childish as you are right now?"

"That's different," he muttered.

"No, Sidney, it's not. It's exactly the same. You of all people should understand why I need to go to Paris."

Sidney continued staring at his feet and opened his mouth like he was going to say something, then decided against it. He sighed, looked around the room, and rubbed the back of his neck. I knew he was agitated, but I couldn't sympathize for him. I was much too angry at him right now; the feelings of guilt had evaporated, and now all I was feeling was resentment. I couldn't believe he thought he was the only one who was hurting because of this mess. Sure, I had brought it on, but I could guarantee I was struggling with Paris more than he was.

"Karine, I don't understand why I'm even speaking to you right now. I can't explain why you are still all I think about. You just…you do something to me. I feel something for you that I have never felt for anyone else in my life. That's how I know I'm in love with you. Yeah, I'm still in love with you. Even now, when you're telling me to fuck off. Even now, when I'm about fifty percent sure that you're going to punch me. Look, I'm used to making sacrifices for other people. I've always been focused on the bigger picture—what's better for my family, what's better for my team…but with you, I'm completely selfish. I don't want you to go to Paris. I know you don't, either. So just stay. Please." He moved toward me and wrapped my hand in both of his. "Please."

My anger instantly evaporated as I looked into his eyes. I had never felt so torn. I knew if I quit my job, I would regret it. But would I regret leaving Sidney even more? "I don't know what to do," I said quietly.

Sid placed his hand on the side of my face and stroked my cheek with his thumb. "Is the thought of me providing for you really that appalling?"

I gave him a small smile, then nodded. "I would feel guilty."

Sid smiled strangely and cocked his head to the side. "What if it was my job to provide for you?"

I frowned slightly, not understanding what he meant. "Huh?"

"What if we were married?"

I felt the blood drain from my face and my mouth fell open in shock. Did he just propose to me? I stammered, unable to form a coherent sentence. "Sid…we've…no, I mean…come on…just think…"

He sighed. "I wasn't expecting you to say yes." He rested his forehead against mine and smiled. "Would it really be that impossible for you to find another job?"

I felt his warm, sweet breath against my cheek and thought I was going to melt. I forgot how even the slightest touch from Sidney would cause electricity to pulse through my body. He was still stroking my cheek with my thumb, and goosebumps rose on my arms. "No," I whispered. "I guess it wouldn't be impossible."

"That is exactly what I wanted to hear."

"But," I said very seriously, stepping away from him so I could think clearly, without the influence of Sid's body so close to mine, "I'm not quitting my job at PPG yet. I'm going to look for a new job, but if I don't find one before I have to leave for Paris, I'm going."

Sid smirked. "Okay. We'll see about that."

My anger flared up again. "Don't patronize me, Sidney. I'm serious."

"I'm not patronizing you," he replied. "I'm just saying, I'm going to make it almost impossible for you to leave. I need you here."

I sighed and rubbed my eyes. "You are so exhausting."

Sidney smiled and pulled me close to him. "So are we finally done being pissed off at each other?"

"I was never mad at you," I replied. "I was mad at myself for hurting you. Have you forgiven me?"

"Absolutely," he replied. He kissed my forehead and wrapped me into a hug. "Hey, I want to show you something."

"What?"

"Just come with me." We left the bedroom and went downstairs, where he grabbed our coats and left Marc and Sylvie's without telling anyone goodbye.

"Where are we going?"

"It's a surprise," Sid replied as he led me to his Range Rover.

THIRTY-SEVEN

I called Sylvie the second that my plane touched down in Pittsburgh. "I'm back," I said simply as I made my way through the airport and to my car.

"Finally," she replied, sounding exasperated. "Do you need someone to come get you at the airport?"

"No, my car's still here."

"Alright. Hey, you should come over. Marc and I are leaving the arena right now, and we're having a few people over. To celebrate, you know. Six-two win over the Leafs. Not very surprising, but a win's a win."

"How many is a few people?" I asked. I wasn't in the mood for a big party, but I did want to see Sylvie and apologize face-to-face.

"Umm, well, Colby and Lauren, Max and Dominique, and probably Jordan."

"And Sidney." It wasn't a question.

"Yeah," Sylvie admitted after a moment's hesitation. "Him too."

"I don't know, Syl…"

"Aw, come on. Don't you want to see everyone after your little impromptu vacation?"

I slid into the driver's seat of my car and sighed. I would have to face them all eventually—I couldn't keep avoiding my friends just because of Sidney. And this would be a good chance for me to apologize to everyone. I wouldn't have to stay very long…just make an appearance and then I could make an excuse about being tired and leave.

"Okay," I said. "I'm on my way."

"Yay!" Sylvie replied. "We'll see you in a few!"

I drove slower than usual to Marc and Sylvie's house, because I didn't want to be the first to arrive. I was dreading seeing everyone, but especially Sid and Colby. I knew Colby would torment me to no end about my "impromptu vacation," as Sylvie put it. I was more concerned about Sidney's reaction, though. Sylvie said he was worried about me—would he be glad to see me or would he completely ignore me?

I exhaled forcefully as I pulled into Marc and Sylvie's driveway. The first car I saw was, of course, Sidney's black Range Rover. I put my car into park and thought about turning around and leaving, but it was too late. Sylvie was running outside to meet me.

"Karine!" she called, wrapping her arms around me in a hug.

"Hi, Sylvie," I laughed.

"Just a warning, Colby is ready to give you a hard time," Sylvie said as she led me in the house.

"Of course he is. I wouldn't expect anything less from Colby."

The second I walked in the door, Colby was all over me. "The prodigal daughter returns!" he yelled from across the room. "Come here, Karine." He bounded across the room and pulled me into a hug. "Honestly, girl, what were you thinking? Who visits their parents?" he asked sarcastically.

I rolled my eyes and pushed him away. "Sorry I worried everyone."

"Nah, we overreacted," Colby replied. His voice became quieter and he leaned in closer. "We were just worried after…you know, how things were between you two at Bugsy's party."

"Yeah, well, that had something to do with me going to Montreal," I admitted quietly. My eyes flickered to Sidney, who was sitting next to Jordan and trying very hard to ignore me.

"That's what we thought," Colby replied, also looking at Sidney. "But hey, no harm done, right? You just gave us a little excitement." He winked at me and returned to Lauren.

I stood near the doorway awkwardly. Apparently Max noticed how uncomfortable I was, because he motioned to me from his perch on the couch facing the wide-screen television. "Karine, come play NHL 08 with me."

"I'm really bad," I warned him, but still took the controller without argument. At least it would be a momentary distraction from how uncomfortable I was being in the same room as Sidney.

"I'm the Habs," Max declared as he selected my favorite team.

"Hey, I'm always Montreal," I whined.

"You can be the Penguins," Max suggested as I scrolled through the list of available teams. "It should be interesting to see how bad you can make us all look," he joked with a wink.

I sighed. "Fine." I pressed the 'x' button and waited for the game to load.

I glanced at Sidney, who was still sitting motionless on the other couch. His gaze met mine and I instinctively looked away.

"Hey, pay attention!" Max ordered. "We're starting!"

My heart jumped as I realized I was playing as Sidney. I miraculously won the faceoff and unsteadily skated to the opposite goal, only to lose control and slam Sidney into the boards by my own power. There was a pause as the game cut out and showed a clip of Sidney doubled over on the ice. He was escorted off and we returned to faceoff position.

"Damn, Sid," Max commented, "it didn't take her long to take you out."

I inhaled sharply as Sidney left the room without a reply.

"Ah, shouldn't have said that," Max said, looking at me apologetically.

"It's fine," I replied in what I hoped was a controlled tone. The rest of our game passed quickly, with Max winning by a five-goal margin. "I told you I was bad," I said with a shrug as I passed the controller to Jordan. I looked around the room and saw that Sidney had still not returned. I muttered something about needing a drink and went into the kitchen, hoping I would find him there.

I faltered momentarily as I saw Sidney leaning against the kitchen island with his back toward me. I reached for a glass and cleared my throat.

"Hi," I said as he spun around to face me.

"Hi." There was an uncomfortable moment of silence and I busied myself with making a drink, just for something to do. "What the hell were you thinking?" he demanded as he moved toward me.

I swallowed hard and looked into his angry, yet still beautiful, brown eyes. "I'm sorry," I whispered.

Sidney shook his head. "I shouldn't care. I know it shouldn't matter to me where you go anymore. But I thought you'd gone and done something stupid because I was such a jerk to you at Bugsy's."

"So you admit you were a jerk."

"What else am I supposed to be, Karine?"

"You said we could be friends," I replied quietly as I averted my eyes to the floor.

Sid clenched his teeth and took another step towards me. "Do you know how impossible that is for me? I can't be just your friend."

"Yeah, 'just friends' would never work. I…I still care about you. A lot. And I'm sorry for everything. At the time I thought I was doing what was best, but I couldn't have been more wrong. If you don't want me around anymore, just say so. You won't have to see me again," I said quietly. I thought my heart was going to burst through my ribcage…I was afraid of his answer. If he said he wanted me gone, that would be it—I would have to walk out of Marc and Sylvie's house and never go to another game or party.

Sidney opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted by a very drunk Lauren stumbling into the kitchen. I raised my eyebrows—she couldn't have been here for longer than half an hour and she was already smashed. "Karine!" she shouted as she staggered to us. "Never go to Montreal again okay? Sidney was pissed!" she slurred.

I glanced at Sid. His cheeks were flushed slightly, probably from a combination of anger and embarrassment.

"Maybe you should go find Colby, Lauren," I replied. I wasn't in any mood to put up with her.

"Colby…is…" Suddenly, her expression changed. Her face became ghostly white and a blank expression passed over her as she leaned forward and vomited all over Sid and me.

THIRTY-SIX

BRIIIIIING. BRIIIIIIIING.

My father grumbled—he'd always hated being interrupted during dinner—and reached for the telephone hanging on the kitchen wall.

"Alain Lemieux speaking," he answered gruffly. His expression brightened slightly when the person on the other line spoke. "Ah, salut, Mario! How's everything going?" He listened to Uncle Mario's reply, then laughed. "Yes, yes, I know how that is. Wait until they reach high school. It doesn't get any easier." I could faintly hear Uncle Mario on the other line, but I couldn't understand what he was saying. My father's expression changed from pleased to confused and his eyes flickered to me several times. "Mario, what are you talking about? She's sitting right beside me….ah, I see. Well, tell them not to worry. She's been here since yesterday morning…right, well, thanks for calling. We'll sort this all out. See you, Mario."

My father replaced the phone in its cradle and glared at me. "That was Mario." I nodded and swallowed a mouthful of ratatouille. "He said that your friends have been looking for you for the past two days, because none of them had any idea you were here." I stared at my food, suddenly feeling very foolish. I hadn't told anyone I was leaving for Montreal, and I had left my cell phone in my apartment in Pittsburgh. I hadn't stopped to think about Sylvie and Marc-André, or Colby and Lauren, or maybe even Sidney…they would be worried about me, certainly. I had essentially disappeared after Ryan's party. "Mario called to tell me that you had disappeared," my father said, his voice rising. "I have never heard my brother so upset. What were you thinking?"

"I wasn't," I admitted. I wasn't thinking of anyone but myself when I left Pittsburgh. "I'm going to call him back," I said as I took the portable phone from its dock and moved into the living room.

The phone rang three times before Uncle Mario picked up. "Uncle Mario, it's Karine."

"Karine," he replied, his voice a mixture of relief and annoyance. "Next time you decide to leave the country for two days, you might want to let one of us know." He was trying to joke with me, but I could hear the serious edge to his voice.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't stop to think that maybe someone would be looking for me."

Uncle Mario sighed. "Sylvie is about to have a stroke. Here, she wants to talk to you."

"KARINE, WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?" Sylvie screeched into the phone. I winced, hurt by both her shrill voice and her anger.

"I'm sorry, Syl. It was a spur-of-the-moment decision…I just needed to get out of Pittsburgh."

"Karine Elise Lemieux, that is the worst excuse I have ever heard. Do you know what we were all thinking? You just vanished after you left Ryan's. We thought you were dead in a ditch somewhere! Especially after what happened…" she trailed off.

"Is he there?" I asked quietly.

"No," she replied. "He and Colby had to leave for the Igloo. Faceoff is in half an hour. But we basically had to push him out the door. He was the most worried about you. He thought that he upset you at Ryan's, and maybe caused something…"

"Wait," I interrupted. "What did you all think happened?"

"Karine, we didn't know what to think. You weren't answering your phone, we checked your apartment and you weren't there, of course you weren't at your office…we couldn't find you anywhere. We thought something happened…something bad."

"Oh God," I breathed. "Syl, I am so, so sorry. I had no idea." My face was burning with shame.

"Just don't do it again, okay?" she said with a tense laugh.

"I'm taking the next flight home. Tell everyone I am so sorry. And really embarrassed. I'll figure out a way to make this up to everyone."

"Don't worry about it. We're just glad you're safe. But…why did you go to Montreal in the first place? We didn't think you'd be there…that's why we just called your parents. We didn't want to worry them."

I sighed. "This is so selfish and immature, but after seeing Sidney at Malone's I just couldn't handle it anymore. I was a wreck, so I decided to run. I thought that leaving the country would put enough distance between me and my problems, but it didn't really work out. It obviously just made things worse."

"I understand where you're coming from, though. Things have been kind of a mess for you lately, haven't they?"

I chuckled at Sylvie's understatement. "Kind of." I exhaled slowly and bit my bottom lip. "Does…does he know I'm okay?" I asked hesitantly.

Sylvie didn't need to ask who I was talking about. "Yeah. Marc called him as soon as Mario talked to your dad. He's probably pissed, but I bet he's more relieved than anything."

I nodded, even though I knew Sylvie couldn't see me. None of this should matter, but somehow it meant a lot to me that Sidney knew I was okay.